GUSWORLD
Rant Of The Day THIS RANT 17/04/97

Rant Of The Day is where I get to mouth off about whatever I feel like for however long I like. Theoretically, I'll update my whinge/opinion piece every weekday; in practice, maybe not so often.

Ken: don't say we didn't warn you

One of Gusworld's favourite themes (alongside Ray Martin, ABBA, the Smurfs, and how much Celine Dion really does suck) is Barbie. A sub-theme of this has been the widely-voiced suspicion that Ken, Barbie's long-time casual shag, might be gay. Evidence presented for this proposition has included the existence of Sparkle Shorts Ken and Ken's fondness for string vests which, if we were being scientific about it, means jack shit. However, we're not being scientific about it. This is a plastic doll we're talking about. (And please note, we're not getting judgemental here, we just want to get the facts straight, if you'll pardon the pun.)

Mattel maintains Ken is as straight as a very straight thing, but it's not doing much to help the cause. Check out the above Barbie Nostaliga postcard, an official piece of merchandise. What do they think that slogan implies? And what about Ken's 'Hello Sailor' pose? It's no wonder Baywatch Barbie comes with a dolphin-shaped vibrator.


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