Published in APC, November 2000

Quick, somebody stop me before I register again. There's no point in hiding it any longer. I'm addicted to domain names. What started out as a simple job requirement has become something of an obsession, and I'm not sure what to do about it.

While my job as Web editorial director for ACP Tech does require me to check out and register domain names on a fairly regular basis, this has fairly defined limits. Once you've started checking out whether schoolpc.com.au is available (not any more, kids), it's only a short step to wondering whether shortstep.com can be had. (No.) Or what about whatabout .com? (No.) Before you know it, every word in your conversation is having a .com added. This doesn't always make for smooth social intercourse (socialintercourse.com -- no).

This is despite the fact that it's a dumb time to become a domain addict (domainaddict.com -- no). It's universally acknowledged that most of the obvious English language domain names in the .com space are taken, leaving slim pickings (slimpickings.com -- no). I think this has made me worse; knowing that any obvious domain name will be gone just stimulates me (stimulateme.com -- no) to try to think of the exceptions, or clever new phrases that no one's tried out (such as clevernewphrases.com -- still available when I wrote this). I'm not about to wimp out and go nuts for a .net or .org domain, but I do admit to getting sucked in when .tv was having a sale recently. And as for .com.au, how many fake businesses can you set up before ASIC starts sniffing around? (sniffingaround.com -- yes!)

Of course, my addiction could be worse. Athough I'm constantly speculating on useful domain names to register, I've only actually invested in a handful (and no, I'm not going to tell you what they are, but I did grab my own name fairly early on in the piece, and I finally got my personal site at gusworld.com.au set up). My credit card isn't damaged yet; it's my dignity that's under threat (underthreat.com -- no).

While general Internet addiction is now a recognised psychological problem, a cursory search of the literature (using, of course, a Web search engine) doesn't reveal too much about domain addiction. The typical Internet addict, according to one site I found when I could tear myself away from netsol.com and ina.com.au, has been using the Internet for less than a year, doesn't work and is most likely to be hooked on Net chat rooms. The majority are male, but most, un-like me, are over 40. I've been using the Internet heavily since 1994, work far too much and haven't got time to use chat rooms because I'm too busy trying to think up new names to register (toregister.com -- no).

Clearly, I need help, and uttering the words 'à la peanut butter sandwiches' (alapeanutbuttersandwiches.com -- no) and hoping for a magic cure is not going to help. The obvious (and oh so noughties) solution would be to set up some sort of online support group, and share my experiences with other fellow sufferers, like the ever-growing number losing their domain names in WIPO decisions. There's just one small problem. I'll need to register a domain name for the support group first.