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Direct To Video
 Meet Yuppy Mantalk!
Betrayal
Just how good could Brian Dennehy be?

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Meet Yuppy Mantalk

Ah, the joy of the direct-to-video movie, be it a crap action flick that was always intended for rental by bored teenagers, or a crap US telemovie that wouldn't get a showing at 3am on Channel 10. Here at Gusworld, we love 'em. Well, maybe we don't love 'em, but we do have a perverse fascination with them. At Direct To Video, our resident expert Yuppy Mantalk reviews these almost-neglected pieces of cultural flotsam.

SEVEN TELLTALE SIGNS OF A DIRECT TO VIDEO TITLE

  1. The words 'BASED ON A TRUE STORY'
  2. The words 'IN THE TRADITION OF . . . '
  3. A list of stars you've never heard of who've made minor appearances you don't remember in movies you have heard of
  4. The words 'FROM THE PRODUCER OF . . .'
  5. Top billing for any one of the following: Brian Dennehy, Lorenzo Lamas, Michael Biehn, Michael Dadakoff, Brian Boswell, Michael Ironside, Roy Schneider, Jennie Garth
  6. An 'AND' credit for someone you've never heard of
  7. Each actor's entire resume on the front cover, just to remind you that you have in fact heard of them
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